Most common excuses for skipping sex.
In a study of 4,000 British adults, one in five admitted to regularly making excuses for not having sex. In a world thatās becoming increasingly chaotic, itās unsurprising to hear that the most exciting thing that happens between the sheets nowadays is simply sleeping.
Here are the top five excuses we use for not having sex:
āIām too tiredā
āPlease babe, Iāve been at work all day and Iām tiredā ā oh, that old chestnut. A recent study has revealed that the āIām too tiredā scenario has become the top excuse to avoid having sex, with āI have a headacheā stepping down from first place to third on the list. As many of us seem to be working longer hours than ever before, itās no surprise that when we reach our bedroom itās often less of the passionate kissing and sexy underwear, and more about the unattractive pyjamas and comfortable slippers. Sometimes we even use āIām too tiredā as an excuse before weāve even thought about whether weāre tired or not. In actual fact, sex floods the brain with relaxing chemicals such as oxytocin, which calms down our brains and compliments our sleep. Suddenly sex is back on the menu…
āIām on my periodā
This is obviously an excuse that the gentleman among us canāt pull out of the bag when theyāre just not feeling up to it. For the ladies, itās a favourite excuse that works every time. When they drop it into a conversation casually, itās an indirect way of saying āIām not up for it. Itās just not happening so before we take this evening any further, please remember that the most youāre getting at the end of the night is a snuggleā. They know that the age-oldĀ ātime of the monthā excuse makes men squirm a little bit before simply being quiet and not asking any more questions on the subject, making this the perfect excuse if theyāre looking for a quick get-out that requires little effort or explanation.Ā You canāt mess with nature, gentlemen.
āIām angry with youā
Some sneaky devils try and avoid sex by dragging out an argument for longer than it needed to last or purposely causing one. Weāve all heard of the scenario; youāre having a fantastic evening watching films, gorging on a candle-lit romantic meal, and laughing at each otherās jokes when suddenly the bedroom part comes and boom ā you just remembered your argument from the other night. Suddenly the candles are blown out, the oversized comfy pyjamas have made their grand entrance and youāre lying on the bed facing opposite directions. No sex tonight.
āIāve got a headacheā
People all over the world seem to get a headache when itās leading up to the big moment. We canāt think why. In fact, the fake headache excuse has been put to use so much that it made it to third place in a recent survey of top excuses for not having sex. If itās a real headache and not a euphemism for āI donāt feel like doing it today, sweetheartā studies suggest that sex can actually help. Indeed, scientists believe that the chemicals released in your brain during sex make getting down and dirty 10 times more effective than Valium. Itās the pleasure aspect that provides pain relief though; if you just lie down passively and make your partner do all the work, it isnāt going to happen. If youāre the one playing the āI have a headacheā card, make sure your partner doesnāt know this handy piece of knowledge. If they do, it might be worth picking another excuse off this list, just to be safe. If youāre partnerās using this excuse, theyāve just been busted.
āI donāt have timeā
We can feel your pain with this one. As weāre working longer hours, there seems to be less time for sex and more time for hard work. If youāre genuinely struggling for time, throw spontaneity out of the window and schedule sex in. It sounds unsexy, but thereās nothing wrong with planning a session of romance if itās completely stopped happening on its own. If youāre one of those people who has plenty of time to plant flowers, paint the bathroom and make artwork out of melted wax crayons but suddenly have no time when it comes to sexy time, it might be best to think of a better excuse. They say that women can multi-task but ironing and doing the deed at the same time could be painful…