The marriage dilemma: When she earns more than him

A growing number of women are now their families’ breadwinners. (Rawpixel pic)

It’s been well established that women have been running the world for quite some time now.

Back in 2015, the Pew Research Centre confirmed that women were earning as much or even more than their male counterparts.

The question here is, if the wife earns more than the husband, how will it affect the way couples budget their finances?

Will it alter the traditional mentality in which the male is responsible as the breadwinner?

What if you earn more than him?

A study conducted by Reach Advisors revealed that the median income of single women between the ages of 22 to 30 was no greater than the income of single men in the same age group is most cities throughout the country.

In Asian culture, men tend to be viewed as the breadwinners of the family. However, times have changed and females are now powerful earners.

So what if you earn more than your husband? Split the cost, of course.

In sticking to tradition, working females split major costs – rent, mortgage, car, food and childcare expenses with their spouses.

But should you have joint or separate bank accounts?

Separate bank accounts are very common amongst couples because it’s easier keeping one’s finances separate.

It’s important to know exactly what’s happening with your money as a couple, so discuss your finances with your partner regularly and openly. (Rawpixel pic)

Household viewpoints

Now that times are changing, so are the viewpoints concerning the duties of a husband and wife.

Many women feel they ought to be exempted from the typical chores associated with being a housewife and that husbands should contribute more hours to the household instead.

Despite earning more than their husbands, some women become resentful because they feel that they are not given as much respect or treated as equally as their husbands.

Of course, extra financial support is good for the relationship in many ways but it can be an obstacle if the couple does not discuss their financial situation and come up with a sound plan, regardless of who earns more.

In many marriages, housework for women is assumed, whereas men believe that taking care of their home is optional. (Rawpixel pic)

Deciding on a budget

The first question for many couples is often who should fork out money and for what purpose.

Some couples regardless of their income will have a 50/50 payment method. This method helps each person in the relationship feel like they are equally contributing to the finances, thus creating a good balance.

However many men still insist on taking on a substantial portion of the monthly expenses, even if the wife earns more.

Talking about money with your significant other isn’t always easy, but it’s also incredibly important. (Rawpixel pic)

Most couples will choose to split the costs of extracurricular expenses such as vacations, entertainment, and even savings.

The costs of a marriage can add up quickly no doubt due to expenses such as rent, food, travel and many other unforeseen costs.

This can quickly overwhelm couples who do not communicate or have a plan in the first place. Splitting costs is especially common when the woman is the one who is earning more.

Once the major expenses have been divided up, it is easy to split the smaller expenses, such as food, clothes, and other miscellaneous costs.

It’s important to have this discussion before getting married.

If you earn more than your husband, it is vital to communicate with your spouse about the finances and come up with a plan that’s good for both parties.

Virginia Satir once said, “Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible — the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.”

This article first appeared in The New Savvy.

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