You think you’re such a great mother

Dear Mum,

You think you’re such a great mother. But do you remember the time I came home crying because the bullies in the school bus wouldn’t leave me alone? All you said to me was, “Well, what to do? You can’t control people.”

Who in their right mind would say that? That brought me no comfort at all!

Now looking back, you weren’t wrong. I can’t control people. Nobody can. What I can do, though, is change the system so that it won’t allow people to hurt each other.

I still have a long way to go before bullying isn’t normal anymore, but the bullies are scared of me now. They know not to say mean things when I’m around. That’s progress, right?

Remember that time you made us trek from Lukla to Everest Base Camp with you? That was at least 20,000 steps uphill every day for a week. Didn’t you think that was a little extreme?

Abang was fine and Kakak was not so bad either, but I felt like dying. Although I did make it to the end in one piece, you pushed me past my limit.

Now looking back I realise that you were just trying to prove to me that I am capable of so much more, in every sense of the word.

You think you’re such a great mother, but you do stumble. A lot. Yet we’ve never had a wound you couldn’t treat.

You’re not perfect, but you’re doing your best. You make sure we feel loved and safe all the time, which is what matters most.

And as much as you want us to learn how to stand on our own two feet, you’re there to catch us when we trip, hoping we never have to fall. When we do fall, you painstakingly rebuild our foundations so we can stand taller than ever before.

You know me better than myself, but you don’t even know today is Mother’s Day. It’s celebrated on the second Sunday of May. That rhymes, so it should be easy to remember.

I bet you’ll forget that in a week anyway. That’s so “you” to do such an amazing job and not think about yourself.

You think you’re such a great mother. You’re not – because you’re so much more than that. You’re an amazing person, a one in 7.7 billion, and there is nobody more suited to be my mother than you. I wouldn’t trade you for the world.

Looking back I realise I’ve never made an effort or taken the time to let it show. Well, that changes starting from now.

You have more faith in my potential than I do myself. I’m sorry it has taken me this long to start loving myself and the world around me.

There is no person more suited to be my mother than you. Thank you for inspiring me to be a better person every day.

I love you, Mum. I really, truly do.

Jehan Ayesha is an FMT reader.

The views expressed are those of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of FMT.