Otilia, Erika and Sasha are the daughters of my three good friends. Having bonded with them through the years, I decided to surprise the ten-year-olds with an invitation for a day out with Aunty Fa.

Our day began with a big waffle breakfast. Seeing them happily gobbling their waffles and gulping down their milkshakes, I decided to engage them in some “adult” conversation.

With all three of them of mixed parentage, I knew just what to ask.

“What do you like about being Malaysian?”

Erika was the first to offer an answer. “The food! I like being a Malaysian because the food is really nice. Also because in Malaysia we can eat anything we want – in Singapore, you cannot even chew gum!”

We all laughed – and I for one could not agree more with her.

“My turn. I think Malaysia is a very good place to live – despite the problems we have, I think there are many nice and friendly people here,” said Otilia.

“What kind of problems do we have, Otilia?” I asked, curious to know what lurked in this little girl’s mind.

“Well, people don’t always get along. Some people like to create trouble.”

“Yeah just like some of the kids in my school. They are such bullies!” Sasha quipped.

Bullies in Malaysia – how true!

I then turned to Sasha and asked what she liked most about being Malaysian. She paused for a while and her face went all twisted before she gave an answer I did not expect.

“I’m not really sure,” said Sasha.

“Oh, why?” I asked.

“Well, Aunty Fa, I was born in Malaysia and that makes me a Malaysian. But most people don’t believe I’m Malaysian. Even when I tell them I am Malaysian, they get surprised and keep on asking. Just because I look and talk a bit different doesn’t make me not Malaysian,” Sasha, who is of Chinese-English parentage said, sounding somewhat annoyed.

“You cannot tell who is Malaysian and who is not just by looking at them,” Erika, of Indian-Filipino mix, said, offering her take on the situation.

“I don’t think it matters – Malaysian or not. We are all people. We have different hobbies, different pets and different cultures. But we are all human,” said Otilia, of Thai-Albanian descent.

I looked at the three little angels around me, admiring their wisdom at such a tender age.

Right after our big breakfast, I took the girls to a neighbourhood playground where I challenged them to climb a short, shaded tree. As they sat on the tree observing the world beneath them, I posed yet a new question.

“What do you often think about?”

“I think about my mom,” said Sasha. “I worry if she is working too hard.”

“I think about the world. I think about how it is to live in Britain or in America. Sometimes I wish there were different seasons in Malaysia,” said Otilia.

“I don’t think I want to live anywhere else but Malaysia,” Erika was quick to respond. “My brother Brandon once went to England and he told me the moment he got out of the airport, his hands were frozen!”

I laughed – Erika was definitely a case of “cuteness overload”.

“So what do you often think about, Erika?” I repeated my question.

“I think about whether people like me or not.”

“Why would you care if people like you or not?” asked Otilia.

“I don’t know. It’s just nice to be liked,” Erika answered, short and sweet.

“Well, sometimes it doesn’t matter how nice you are, people still will not like you,” added Sasha.

After monkeying around at the playground, we collectively decided on refreshments – so we drove to a nearby mall. On our way there, we stopped at a traffic light for a good few minutes.

“Aunty Fa, look at that woman putting on makeup in her car – I think she is so vain. What do you think?” Otilia asked.

“Urm, perhaps she just wants to look presentable,” I answered.

“I think she is vain. I think people should just be themselves and be happy with the way they are,” Sasha sharply responded.

“Yeah!” Otilia agreed.

Erika slowly added, “But I like makeup. And I like dressing up. I don’t think it is wrong. It’s just doing what we like. I think it is okay to be different…”

I found myself grinning once again. Such precious conversation. Such wonderful characters and all due to good parenting.

During our late lunch that day, we went straight for desserts. As we dug into our cake, Erika began talking about her new dog, Button and Otilia spoke of Sky, a cat she rescued off the streets. Listening to both girls, Sasha decided to say something.

“Aunty Fa, remember when you asked me what I liked about being Malaysian? I think I have the answer.”

All three of us – Erika, Otilia and myself were all ears.

“If you ask me what I like about being Malaysian, I have no answer for you. But if you want to know what I like about Malaysia, I have an answer,” said Sasha, her eyes shining.

“What do you like about Malaysia?” asked a now super curious Erika.

“I like Malaysia because it is home. It is where my family lives. Since I was born, I had to follow my mom and dad to live in many different countries, and every time just as I blended in, we moved again. Sometimes I didn’t even want to unpack my boxes because what’s the point, right? But Malaysia is different. My uncles, aunties, cousins, my grandmother – everyone is here. It’s home. And I really like that. I think that is what I like the most about Malaysia.”

“Yeah, I like Malaysia because I have my dad, my mom and Sky here,” Otilia said in agreement.

“Me too. I like Malaysia because my family and friends are here,” said Erika with a big smile plastered across her face.

No matter how different we are, there is always one common thing we share – our love for our family. And that bond gently pulls us back to our origins – the place where our ancestors built a home for their family, full of hopes and dreams for the future.

Children like Erika, Sasha and Otilia often remind me of those hopes and dreams. Even when adults like ourselves sometimes abandon that familial bond as we search for bigger things in life, I am grateful that as far as children are concerned, family is solidly imprinted in their hearts and minds.