Of all the cinemas operating throughout Malaysia, none serves alcoholic beverages at their concession stands. Which is a shame, because certain movies are agonising to watch while sober, requiring those who are able to drink to sneak a flask into the theatre.
The aptly named “Beautiful Disaster” is one such film – a train wreck of a romantic comedy that ploughed into cinemas on May 4. One must really wonder how or why someone would choose to watch this dreck instead of “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3” likely playing in the adjacent theatre.
Whether by chance or by choice, viewing this is certainly an experience – though not necessarily a good one. To explain why, perhaps a summary of the plot would be helpful.
The film is an adaptation of 2011 novel of the same name by Jamie McGuire. Meet Abby Abernathy (Virginia Gardner), a college freshman (or freshwoman?) who enrols in college hoping to leave her troubled past behind.
However, her plans to be a good student are derailed when she runs into Travis “Mad Dog” Maddox (Dylan Sprouse), a known Casanova on campus. When he’s not engaging in aboveground activities, he’s duking it out in underground boxing matches.
The two couldn’t be more different but, of course, since this is a rom-com, opposites attract. Sigh.
When Abby turns down his advances, Travis offers her a bet: if he loses his next fight, he won’t sleep around a month. If he wins it, they will live together as roommates for the same duration.
Whatever the outcome, the two are in for quite the journey as they learn more about each other, right before ghosts from Abby’s past show up at her doorstep.
Just reading this cheesy synopsis is likely to make you grimace, and it hardly helps that author McGuire is a questionable character herself, having expressed extremist, racist, and anti-science views recently.
One might wonder why this novel, in particular, would receive a film adaptation when there are so many other better stories out there with less repulsive creators. In fact, the book itself has some troubling themes, with the main relationship being borderline creepy and manipulative at points.
But anyhow, this review is about the film. Malaysians who grew up watching the Disney Channel on Astro might recognise Sprouse from “The Suite Life of Zack & Cody”. (Fun fact for fans of the sitcom “Friends”: alongside his brother Cole, Sprouse was also one of the twins who played Ross’ son, Ben.)
Yup, that’s little Zack/Ben all grown up! And boy, has he ever – director Roger Kumble seems very aware that Sprouse is quite the stud and doesn’t waste any opportunity to show off the eye candy.
Thankfully, the actor brings more than just washboard abs to the film. He does play a charismatic fellow who’s smarter than he looks.
Indeed, there actually is chemistry between him and co-star Gardner, for what it’s worth. She carries herself well, offering a decent performance, despite there not being much to her character.
The film also remembers that comedy a component of a rom-com, and it does what it can to get a giggle out of the audience. Sadly, most of this laughter comes from the corny dialogue between the characters.
This writer has purged the movie from his brain to spare him the agony, but the book has gems such as: “All I need is you. You’re all I think about. You’re what I dream about. You’re all I want.” Groan.
The pacing of the film is also ridiculously swift. Often it feels like the story is stampeding towards its conclusion rather than taking its time building up to it.
All in all, if you have the misfortune of catching “Beautiful Disaster”, it might be prudent – even necessary – to dull your senses before stepping into the theatre. You won’t want to remember anything by the time the credits roll.
Postscript: It’s probably obligatory to add this disclaimer that by no means is the writer advocating illicit activity in the cinema. It’s called being facetious, y’all.
As of press time, ‘Beautiful Disaster’ is, unfortunately, playing in selected cinemas nationwide.