However, for one family, the Christmas carols and the beautifully-decorated tree can only do so much to ease the pain they still carry in their hearts. For them, 2021 was a tough year, battling an invisible enemy that left a big hole in its wake of destruction.
“When I received the result that I had Covid, the first thing I did was to see how I could leave the house because I didn’t want my family exposed to it,” Eria Raja Lourdes told FMT, about his diagnosis in March.
The 56-year-old management consultant was admitted to Sungai Buloh Hospital and had a “relaxing time” there as he was asymptomatic. All the same, he missed his family terribly.
“I was very happy to come back home on Good Friday and join my family for the Good Friday and Easter services,” he added.
The incident however, put everyone on edge and they eagerly awaited their vaccination dates.
His wife, Swandairy Subramaniam, 55, was vaccinated on July 12. Raja himself and his two daughters, Alyshia Ann Lourdes, 25, and Alysson Ann Lourdes, 23, were scheduled to receive theirs on July 22.
The virus however, had other plans. On July 21, Alyshia tested positive for Covid-19.
“I had not been feeling well for a couple of days. I had a sore throat and headache,” she said, rationalising to herself that her symptoms stemmed from eating too much durian.
“It never crossed our mind that it was Covid,” Raja added.
As it turned out, she wasn’t the only one who contracted the virus. 11 others from four families in the neighbourhood tested positive for Covid-19. This included Raja’s 88-year-old mother, Alice Lourdsamy.
Reeling from this development, the family tried to remain calm. His mother was placed under home quarantine initially and was closely monitored, but at one point, her oxygen level plunged to 50% and she was rushed to hospital.
She died shortly afterwards.
While at the hospital, the family was able to talk to her via video call. “We had the call at 3pm for about thirty minutes. We’re so thankful that we were allowed to talk to her for that long, and we all managed to say something to her. She passed away at 5.55pm,” Alysson recalled.
“She would have celebrated her 89th birthday on Dec 19,” Raja added, saying the pain of losing his mother was immeasurable.
The family could not hold a wake. Nor have a proper funeral mass in church because the number of Covid-19 cases at the time was at its peak and churches were shut. All they were told was that the cremation of his mother’s remains would take place a few days later.
To Raja and his family, this was the darkest period for them, more so since his mother was a dear woman, and a loving grandmother, neighbour, friend and caregiver. In other words, a central figure in their lives.
“Ever since my children were born, she was the one who took care of them. For them, their grandmother was their hero, and they called her the ‘iron lady’,” Swandairy said, adding that she loved her mother-in-law like she did her own mother.
The moniker “iron lady” stuck because Raja’s mother had a strong will to survive. “She became a single mother at a young age, and looked after seven children, 16 grandchildren, and even her great-grandchildren,” Alysson and Alyshia told FMT.
Raja chimed in, “My mom was an excellent cook. She had the ‘Midas touch’ when it came to cooking – she could turn leftovers into a new dish.”
He said his mother was also a warm-hearted person, and when church members dropped by, she’d cook up a feast for them.
“I especially love the roast chicken with gravy that she used to make for Christmas,” he added, realising with a pang of sadness that this dish will not make an appearance on the Christmas table this year.
Keeping traditions alive
Undoubtedly Christmas will be a bittersweet affair for Raja and his family.
“We discussed it about two months ago, and the debate was: should we put up the Christmas tree? Would it be proper to decorate the house in a period of mourning?
“Eventually, it all boiled down to: what would my mother have wanted? She loved to have a celebration and have people around. I think if we didn’t put up the tree, she would be even more upset,” he said.
Swandairy added, “After all, Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Christ and Christians rejoice in that. And when it came to Christmas, my mother-in-law loved to cook and feed people. So, we decided to follow that tradition.”
Today, the Christmas tree sits beautifully in their living room. But more than just a decoration, it is symbolic of their hopes for the future – because the tree is the handiwork of the fourth generation of the family who came together to decorate it.
“My grand nephews and nieces always look forward to putting up the tree, and I was not going to stop that tradition,” said Raja.